An Open Letter to Those Trying to Talk My Boyfriend Out of Our Military Relationship

To Whom It May Concern,

“And everyone I talk to out here says to just end it now because these relationships never work.”

My heart, filled with anger and sadness, sank to the bottom of my gut after reading what my boyfriend had just texted me.

You told him that I wouldn’t be able to handle the 4,000 miles between us. I won’t be able to handle his busy schedule you said. It is a guarantee that I will cheat you said. Because I chose to not move in with him the relationship will surely fail you said.

…

I realize, that to the military, I am nothing. Not his family. Not his wife. I am just a girlfriend. I do not matter to the United States military.

Of this, I am fully aware.

But shame on you for assuming what kind of woman I am. Shame on you for filling my boyfriend’s head with worry and his heart with sadness.

And while I am filled with hurt, I also have gratitude towards you. Thank you for putting a fire in my heart and a determination in my soul to make this distance work.

Watch me handle deployments with grace and love. Watch me have the patience and understanding to deal with our differing work schedules. I hope you get to witness the care packages he will get along with the constant flow of emails, letters and funny cards. I had the strength to stay back home so I could enhance my career and finish my schooling so that I wouldn’t have to rely on the military for money. So, watch me not cheat on him or use him for his military paycheck because I took the time to establish myself.

And, unfortunately, while what you keep driving into his head has an impact what I have to say to him has a greater one. Little do you know how strong my boy is and how much love he has for me.

You bringing our relationship down gave me the opportunity to relive with him all the beautiful memories that we have had, the ones that have made us laugh until we cried. And with those memories came the pictures: the happiest pictures of us on our anniversary, that one that I made a stupid face by the river, pictures from every single graduation he has had. All to remind him that even when we were thousands of miles apart we were never truly far from each other.

So, I thank you. For you made us stronger and you sparked a passion in me to be the best “girl back home” that I can be.

 

Love always,

A dedicated and strong military girlfriend

 

 

 

Meet A MILSO Monday: Raquelle and Garet

Written by Raquelle:

“So, Garet and I met our first year of college together in English. As soon as he walked in I knew that it would be a hard class to focus in and I was SO right! One day in class he told me to come sit next to him and the rest is history. I knew that he wanted to join the military but I didn’t want to  accept it because I’ve had horrible experiences with family members in the military.

One Year Down, A Lifetime To Go

Last Saturday I scrambled out of work as fast as I could back to my house. I wrestled up all my belongings and stuffed everything I could into a suitcase then hopped in my mom’s car and headed for the airport.

After tearfully saying goodbye to my mom (when I say tearfully I really mean ugly cry) I went through security, boarded my plane and impatiently waited to land. The plane eventually hit the runway and docked and I waited for what seemed like forever to get my baggage. I snatched my luggage up as quick as I could and hauled it outside to meet Taylor.

It was dark and I had to squint to see his black car pull up. I forgot how sticky the weather in Charleston is so I was even more impatient for him to arrive. But finally his car rolled up and all I remember was being picked up and hugged so tight. And so began my week long adventure with Taylor.

Handling Death One Thousand Miles Away

I knew this text was coming and I was dreading the day that it would. Goose is Taylor’s dog that has been in his life for 14 years. Everyone knew that Goose was “his”dog and you could tell they loved each other immensely.

But Goose was sick. He was 14 years old. He did this horrible coughing, wheezing sound, he had occasional seizures and didn’t hold body weight very well. I knew this text was coming.

So you want to start a MILSO social media account?

We’ve all seen them and follow them. The Facebook pages for MILSO’s. The Instagram accounts. Twitter. You name it, there’s a social media account for it.

What’s in My Care Package: Easter Edition

I JUST realized last weekend that Easter is right around the corner. So, sorry this post is late and probably won’t give anyone much help or advice but I am going to post it anyway!

Why I Am Watching Army Wives And Why You Should Too

The first time I heard about this show, I was probably about 14 years old. I was sitting in my living room watching some movie on Lifetime and I remember the commercial because I thought it was a weird thing to make a show about. I watched the first episode and I thought it was boring so I didn’t bother with it again, simple as that.

Fast forward eight years later and here I am scrolling through Netflix trying to find a good show to watch while I go to sleep. I stumbled upon “Army Wives” and obviously my interest was immediately peaked. I remembered when I was 14 and tried watching it and I thought that maybe I could give it one more shot since you know…I’m a navy girlfriend and all.

How To Spend Valentine’s Day…Without Your Valentine

Picture from pixabay.com

I’ve seen a mixture of reactions towards Valentine’s Day. You have the crabby, single people who constantly moan and groan about being single. You have the “overly in love” couple that posts twenty different pictures on all possible social media of how in love they are. But what happens when you’re a military girlfriend?

Why I Refuse To Marry Young

The first time me and Taylor went to a wedding was at the beginning of fall of last year. It was for one of his friends that he had met during school. The wedding was hosted at the bride’s house which was a gorgeous farm. The leaves were starting to change colors and they got married under some willow trees as the sun was setting. Extremely romantic. But from what I learned, they were a few years younger than my 22-year-old self and had only been officially dating for about six months. This kind of shocked me.

What It Feels Like To Say Goodbye

Our goodbyes always go the same way and this time didn’t seem any different. I started crying the second we pulled into the airport and he hugs me and tells me it’s all going to be okay and tries to make me laugh. We walked in, checked my luggage and sat in a coffee shop for awhile to pass the time since he wasn’t allowed to wait at the gate with me.

About an hour before my flight, me and T walked towards the security check and of course, the tears started coming. Then we said our goodbyes and I started to make my way towards security. I weaved my way through the maze of ropes and gave the security man my ticket to sign and tried not to look back but I couldn’t help myself. And there he was still watching me leave. He waved a little and blew me a kiss and I blew one back and my heart just broke.

And when I say broke, I mean broke. My heart literally felt like it was being ripped out of my chest and burned.  I decided that I had to go back. I didn’t care if I missed my flight, I didn’t care that I was hungry or that I had a headache from crying. I just needed to get back to Taylor. It was exactly like a scene from a cheesy, romantic movie. I started crying and looked at the security guard. He was a little older and had dark gray hair with a little patch missing on the top. His demeanor was warm.

“I need to go back. I forgot something.”